What Happened To Us?
by Bookjunkie-22
Summary: Taylor and Ryan form a friendship after Marissa's death. See how it affects this alternate season four. I really suck at summaries, sorry.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer- I don't own The OC, this was just an idea that came to me when I was _trying_ to sleep. This chapter is short cause it's the prologue.

* * *

Ryan fidgeted with his car door. It was a rental and he didn't like it. He wanted his car back. He wanted- No. He couldn't have his car or her back.

He looked at the church where his whole family was right now. Where her whole family was right now. He quickly turned back to his car for the fifth time.

"Chicken." He heard someone mutter.

He looked up to see a girl with auburn hair in a black dress. She was muttering to herself and she seemed to be going through the same motions he was. She'd get out of her car start for the church, then turn abruptly on her heels and go back to her car.

She let out a groan and he finally called to her, "Taylor? Are you okay?"

She looked up shocked, "Ryan? What are you doing out here? Shouldn't you be inside right now?"

"Could ask you the same question." He shrugged walking over to her car.

"I…" she started and stopped staring at her hands, "I'm not sure I belong here. I did get Ma-" she paused when she saw him flinch, "her kicked out of Harbor."

"Yeah, but then you got her back in." he pointed out.

"Why aren't you inside?" she countered ignoring his point.

"I can't face them." He said simply, and Taylor knew not to pick at old wounds.

Ryan looked at her for a long time. He didn't even know Taylor Townsend that well. He'd spent three years of his life chasing after Marissa Cooper, and now she was gone, and what did he have to show for it?

"Well since we're not going to this, do you wanna go to the diner and get a cup of coffee?" he asked.

Taylor looked back towards the church and he followed her gaze. He knew what she was thinking before she said a word. They should be in the church, paying their last respects. She should be comforting Summer, and he should be giving a eulogy and telling the whole place what a great woman Marissa Cooper was. They both had things they were supposed to be doing, but nevertheless Taylor said, "Sure." And Ryan climbed into her car, hoping Seth would take care of the rental.

* * *

"Is it okay if I say this is weird?" Taylor asked softly.

Ryan nodded, "I was thinking the same thing." Taylor sighed in relief as she stirred some sugar into her coffee, while Ryan drank his black and devoid of any taste.

It was weird. Ryan knew it was going to be. He didn't know this girl outside of Seth and Summer, and she didn't know anything about him other than the fact that he was Seth's brother.

Well he did know that she had been extremely annoying in school. One of those girls who would pretend to have sympathy for you if you failed a test before proudly showing off her 'a' so you can return the ego stroke. And then she did get Mar- _her_ kicked out of Harbor which subsequently got _him_ kicked out of Harbor. But then she had a hand in getting both of them back in so in the end it all evened out.

"So how much did you hate me when we were in school together?" Taylor asked, with a smile to show she wouldn't get offended.

Ryan frowned wondering if she had read his mind or if he'd spoken his thoughts aloud, "We didn't hate you."

"Oh please," she grinned, "You were probably the President of the 'We Hate Taylor' club."

Ryan shook his head modestly, "No. I was the secretary." He mirrored her grin, "I took the notes."

"Ryan!" she said happily, "You made a joke."

He nodded suddenly at ease, "A little one." When the laughter subsided her side of the table got awkward again, while he was still actually okay. He wanted to tell her. He didn't know why, but he had a feeling she'd understand in the way that Seth and Summer wouldn't. It had only been a week since Mari- _her_ death and he knew what he needed to do, "I'm leaving."

"Oh okay. I can get the check. Do you need a ride back to your car?" the girl prattled on, trying to disguise her hurt at his abrupt announcement.

"No, I mean… I'm leaving Newport." He said.

"Oh." She said happy he wasn't leaving the table. She fully processed his comment and widened her eyes, "What?"

"I'm leaving Newport. I need… I think I need to get away."

"Where will you go?" she asked.

He shook his head, "I don't know."

"Will you ever come back?" Ryan shrugged his shoulders, "Okay." Taylor said nodding.

Ryan finished the rest of his coffee.

* * *

He looked in the mirror at his bloody and bruised face, grinning, then he looked at the picture of Marissa next to his bed, and shook his head. _Nope, still hurts._

The door opened and she hanging her apron up on the hook, she took one look at his face and sighed, "Give me a minute."

She left the room again and returned moments later with an icepack, like always. Well not always, just since they ran away from Newport together.

Taylor climbed up to the top bunk and Ryan lay on the bottom one, still holding the ice to his eye, still grinning from the sight of the other guy going down. Taylor stretched her hand down to reach his and he stretched his up to meet her, before they both started drifting off to sleep.

* * *

Okay kinda weird right? But it will get better, I promise.

Please review.

-Em


	2. Chapter 1

Ryan's ringing cell phone woke Taylor from her much needed sleep. She groaned his name annoyed as he answered it. She knew who it was, and he knew she knew. He knew she disapproved but it didn't matter.

"Hello? Right now?" Ryan glanced up to see a sleepy Taylor glaring at him, "No. I- Yeah. Yeah, okay. I'll be right there."

"It's the middle of the night." Taylor said, climbing down from her bunk.

"I need to go." He said washing his hands and face, while Taylor listed the many reasons why he did not in fact 'need' to go.

"We both have work in the morning-" was the last thing she got to when Sandy Cohen's voice boomed from the other side of the door.

"Hey Ryan, you there?" he asked knocking.

Taylor sent Ryan a panicked look and he merely ushered her to the open window helping her out before following himself.

"I just wanna talk to you for a second. Come on, we miss you. We're worried about you." Was what Ryan heard as he reached in and grabbed both their sneakers off the stand.

"Let's go." Taylor sighed slumping into the passenger seat of his car.

"I'll stay in the car." She said as they pulled up to the motel.

"You sure?" he asked, and she knew he was a little concerned. After all they were in Newport again.

She nodded, "I'm sure I don't want to be a part of this."

Ryan sighed. They had this argument once a day. She wouldn't change his mind and he wouldn't change hers. "Go." Taylor's voice interrupted his thoughts, "She's waiting."

He glanced around to make sure no one was around and he got out of his car and walked up to door 14. He glanced over his shoulder to see Taylor moving the seat in the recline position so she could get a few more hours of sleep, and he felt bad. Bad that he dragged her into this mess when he promised to never get another person mixed up in his horrible life again. He turned back to the door and knocked.

* * *

**36 hours earlier**

"Taylor sent me some pics from Paris." Seth told Summer's voice mail, "Did you get them too? Her e-mail was in French so I'm not quite sure what it said. Maybe your French is better than mine."

* * *

"Just take it." Taylor hissed at him.

"Please lose the hat." Ryan laughed, "I can't do this if you're wearing that stupid thing."

"It's not a _hat_, Ryan. It's a beret." She said trying not to laugh, but failing. They were food shopping for the week, when Taylor spotted it in the corner shop. It reminded her that she hadn't sent Seth, Summer, or her mother –who probably wasn't reading them anyway- a new e-mail in weeks. So she pulled out her digital camera and posed on the street wearing the beret, so she could later PhotoShop in some Paris backgrounds.

"It looks like a _hat,_ Miss Townsend." He said snapping the pictures as she giggled at him.

This was the good times. When they weren't fighting over Julie Cooper or when she was cleaning up after his after work activities, or when she wasn't trying to psycho analyze him before bed. But when they were just walking in town like two normal college students. Not two kids who passed up on their futures and are now stuck working at a skeevy bar where you can catch and STD sitting on a stool.

"Okay." She said posing like she was pointing to something.

"You gonna do and Eiffel Tower one?" he questioned, and she nodded.

Yeah it was better like this.

* * *

Seth was knocking on their door again. She could feel Ryan's knuckles clench on the springs coils holding up her mattress as they both tried to remain quiet.

"Ryan?" he called knocking.

"Seth, go away. We'r-" Taylor kicked the bottom of her mattress, "_I'm_ sleeping."

"You're sleeping? And you're talking?" Seth asked in a surprised tone, and Taylor knew he was about to prattle off some quip about Ryan not talking when he was awake, but he talks in his sleep, or something like that. It's what she would have said. In fact she _had_ said that to him on more than one occasion. "Ryan, I don't even see how that's possible." So maybe she'd been away from Seth too long to gage his responses anymore. Or maybe Ryan leaving again just did something to him. "Unless you're talking in your sleep."

Taylor climbed off the bed and moved into the closet, like usual, while Ryan opened the door.

"Hey look you're awake." Seth grinned.

"That from your mom?" Ryan asked grabbing the bag out of his hands, "Thank you." Ryan tried to close the door and Taylor was about to step out of the closet to inspect this weeks care package but Seth held out his arm.

"Aren't you gonna invite me in?" he asked, and Taylor's heart broke at the needy-ness of his voice, he just wanted his friend back, "So the utility closet is the new pool house things change. But the need for Seth/Ryan time never does."

"I'm tired Seth. I work nights."

"Right, but you don't work tonight. I checked with your boss." Seth said feeling like he won, "Which is why I'm inviting you to dinner with us." Ryan shook his head and Taylor resisted the urge to step out of the closet and shove him out the door, "Just show up, eat some food. Show the parents you're still alive."

"Alright sure. I'll see you tonight." Ryan said and Taylor had a feeling he was just saying it so he could get Seth out of there and her out of the tiny closet.

"Right." Seth said, "Hey what are you doing? Cause I was gonna go get some ice cream or something—okay. See you tonight." Ryan shut the door as Seth left.

"Are you really gonna go?" Taylor asked sliding out of the closet, "It's not the first time they've invited you."

"Go back to bed. I might not have to work tonight, but you have a shift."

Taylor shrugged, "You know I can always get out of it. They're called boobs Ryan."

She laughed at the way his cheeks turned completely red as she climbed back up onto her bunk, "Good night."

* * *

A few hours later they were awakened yet again, only this time to the sound of her cell phone ringing.

"It's Summer." Ryan yawned passing it up to her.

"Great." She said, "_Bonjour._"

"Hey Taylor." Summer said happily, "Oh my God, I can't believe I actually have you on the phone."

"I think you mean _mon Dieu_, Summer." Taylor gave one of her fake giggles, that made Ryan cringe, "Yes, _c'est moi_."

"How's Paris?" Taylor rolled her eyes. She had no idea how Paris was. She had no desire to ever know how Paris is. Paris was a stupid idea in the first place. She didn't belong there. And nobody had realized just how much she didn't want to leave until him.

Just thinking about it made Taylor reach out to grasp Ryan's already waiting hand, "Oh incredible. You know being an expat totally suits me." Ryan chuckled low, "Except that I miss you." She added and she was completely serious. Summer had been her only female friend. Her first friend, in her whole life.

"_Summer the coffee shop's about to close, and we gotta run off some more flyers."_Taylor heard some guys voice in the background.

"Totally, tell them to use the recycled paper."

"Summer?" Taylor asked confused, "What are you doing?"

"Nothing!" Summer answered too quickly, "College stuff. Listen I was just calling to say I got your e-mail, but neither Seth nor I can read them. Oh and uh… well I noticed that you also Cced Ryan and well Taylor, I know you and Ryan weren't that close." Taylor had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing at that, "But he's been sorta MIA since Marissa's funeral."

"Oh." She said acting surprised.

"Yeah." Summer paused and Taylor heard the voice again, "I gotta go Taylor. But listen don't be a stranger, okay?"

"Of course. Have fun Summer." Taylor closed her phone and sighed, "I wish we were all back in high school again."

"Me too." Ryan mumbled and Taylor knew it was because of Marissa.

It had never bothered Taylor when she thought about how much Ryan loved Marissa. They were supposed to be together, Ryan and Marissa and Seth and Summer. She was just the friend who sat on the sidelines. She was in one picture with the five of them, not counting graduation day. She didn't exactly fit in with them, but it didn't matter. They had sort of been friends in high school. And she was good at school. She knew what she was good at and excelled in it.

This was real life, and while she was grateful to have Ryan with her, she knew he would rather be back in his pool house with Seth, Summer, and Marissa.

She wasn't good at real life. But she was good at faking it.

* * *

"Get dressed." Taylor said shoving him towards their shared closet.

"I have something to do first." He insisted.

"You do not," she said shoving him again, and then wincing when she heard him take in a deep sharp breath. She must have touched a bruise, "You have a family dinner to attend."

"Taylor." He said, turning from her and going for the door, "I have something important to do."

She laughed bitterly, "Yeah, important."

* * *

She almost never watched when he got himself beaten up for _fun_. The first few times she'd been there, but mostly she just waited for him in their room. Today was different though.

Today she had to watch. She had to know why. The Cohen's were welcoming him home, and yeah she knew he didn't want to go and be reminded of her, but she also knew that he needed to go. He needed to face what he left behind. He knew it too and that was probably why he was running from it.

She cringed as the guys fist collided with Ryan's face trying to calculate how much ice she was gonna need later. He got thrown across the _cage_ and landed in front of her.

It hurt to look into his eyes and see nothing, but she did. She looked him straight in the eyes and shook her head, mouthing _you're an idiot_. Before turning her back on his and wiping away her stray tears.

It was then that she spotted Seth at the entrance watching Ryan get thrown and beaten. He looked even more upset than she was by it.

She shook her head one more time in Ryan's direction, and fled through the back door, hoping Seth wouldn't see her.

* * *

When he walked through the door he was pelted with whatever small objects they had lying around the room.

"I cannot," shoe hit Ryan in the arm, "believe you would be so stupid," an empty plastic cup collided with his forehead, "as to fight with Ray. They don't call him The Destroyer for nothing, Ryan!" she exclaimed as she threw the only thing her hand could find, a pen at him.

"Do we have any ice?" was all he asked when she stopped throwing things. She begrudgingly handed him the ice pack that was on the dresser, "And you don't have to get so mad at me. Your boyfriends the one who threw the most punches."

"My boyfriend?!" she all but yelled, "Ray is not my boyfriend and you know it, Ryan Atwood! I served him beer the first day we got here and I haven't been able to get rid of him since. And you know what? I'm getting sick and tired of you picking fights with him every time he walks in the door. Do you want to loose both of our jobs?"

"Can we just not argue today, Taylor?" he asked almost pathetically, "I already got a lecture from Seth, I don't need it from you too."

"Whatever." She said, picking up the items she threw at him, "But I swear to God, Ryan if you start telling me the bull, that I have no doubt you fed Seth, _again_, about how we would all be better off without you in out lives, _I'm_ gonna fight you next time."

Ryan half grinned, "You might be better off without me Townsend, but I'm not sure how I'd survive with you." Taylor took the ice pack out of his hands and applied it to the right spot.

"You keep this up and I'm gonna have to figure out how to survive without you." She said softly, but he shook his head.

* * *

Ryan was behind the bar when she walked in. He wanted to signal Taylor, but he knew she'd see. Besides Taylor was still drowsy from their escapades in Newport the night before, if he tried to signal her she'd probably think he was calling her over.

"Atwood." Summer nodded taking a seat at the bar. "I like what you've done with your face."

"Roberts."

"Look I know you're not talking, and that's fine." Summer said, "But I'm gonna need you to come with me now."

Before he could respond Taylor was there, obviously not realizing what she was walking into as she skirted past him behind the bar to grab her order, "I just need to grab three beers. My _boyfriend_ and his buddies are here. I swear if I have to listen to him tell the story of how he kicked your ass one more time…" she trailed off and grabbed him by the chin to make him look her in the eye, as she checked out his face for bruises. She let go and shrugged, "You got worse going up again Pete." Ryan grimaced and looked over Taylor's shoulder. She followed his gaze and dropped her tray.

"_Taylor_?"

"Summer?" Taylor's eyes went wide.

"What are you doing here?" Summer asked trying to control her surprise, "I just talked to you, you were in France. Not at some dive bar with Ryan- and oh my god, one of these guys is your boyfriend. Ew." Summer paused, realizing that was the first time she'd said 'ew' since before Marissa died. "Since when are you guys friends."

"Roommates." Taylor shrugged, "I gotta go, give this to Ray and his friends."

"Okay, you've both lost your minds. I'm gonna deal with this little shocker later. I want both of you guys to get in the car now, I've got something to show you." Summer said taking deep breaths to calm herself.

"Can't do it." Ryan said when Taylor came back up to the bar, "We have work.." he added more to Taylor than Summer.

"Andy, Ryan and I have to take off. We'll be back for clean-up." Taylor yelled and then gave Ryan a look as if daring him to challenge her.

"Ok." Their boss yelled back.

"Perfect." Summer said, glancing between her friends. She still wasn't sure what was going on but if Taylor was going to help her get Ryan back to the Cohen's where he belonged, then she wasn't going to ask questions… yet.

* * *

"So why are we going to the comic book store?" Ryan asked.

The whole ride had been silent between the three of them. Ryan was busy glowering at Taylor. Summer was driving and trying not to ask what the hell had been going on between the two of them for the past five months and Taylor was… reading.

She had tried to stay in the car, and Summer was close to letting her. She didn't want Cohen and… well the other Cohen's asking the girl questions that Summer, herself, wanted to be the first one to know the answer to. But Atwood had hauled her out of the car and Taylor didn't protest much after that.

"Because I said so, and you agreed to do what I said, so…" Summer trailed off.

"As I told Seth, I really don't want to…" Ryan trailed off when Summer opened the door to reveal his family, "…talk."

"You don't have to talk." Sandy said. "You don't even have to listen."

Seth piped up from the back, "Well actually I would appreciate it if you listened. I went through a lot of trouble here and- Taylor?" he stopped and then turned to Summer, "I realize this is an intervention but you really didn't need to drag Taylor all the way from France."

Summer shook her head and motioned for them to continue, which Kirsten did, "All you have to do is watch."

"What's this?" Ryan asked as they turned out the lights and Seth's comic book appeared on the white screen, "You made me a comic book?"

"This is your family reaching out." Taylor whispered, placing a hand on his shoulder.

While Seth started the origin of Kid Chino, Summer moved to her friend and led her out the door.

"Okay Taylor, spill." Summer said.

Taylor bit her lip as she and Summer moved to sit on the stairs. She wondered where to start.

* * *

Okay wow that was a long chapter to write. I guess you guys can tell that the next chapter will be partly about why Taylor went with Ryan, which I hinted to. I don't think it will start at the beginning of them living together. I think it just starts during the first week, but I'm not sure, cause I haven't wrote it yet.

Anyway review.

-Em


	3. Chapter 2

Taylor nervously picked at her nails while Summer waited. Summer was becoming impatient at any moment she was going to yell, "How long have you been sleeping with Atwood?"

Taylor looked up surprised, and Summer bit her lip embarrassed and mumbled, "I didn't mean to say that out loud…"

Taylor shook her head, "Summer it's not- Ryan and I, we aren't- we're friends Summer." Summer nodded, "Do you remember the week of Marissa's funeral? When Ryan disappeared? You called me in tears and begged me to come over and asked me if I had any idea where he went… I lied. I'm sorry Summer, but I lied. I knew exactly where he was cause I drove him there. He told me he was leaving Newport and I offered him a ride, because I knew his car got wrecked in… well in the accident."

Summer took a deep breath, "When I called you… and I was crying cause I just lost Co- Ma- _her_, and now Ryan had disappeared and I was scared Cohen was going to leave me too, and I'd be left with no one- and you knew? You knew where he was?" Summer wasn't sure if she should be crying or yelling. So she tried a little of both.

"Summer I promised him I wouldn't tell." Taylor offered as an explanation, "And Seth didn't leave you." She added in a weak argument.

"Just…just tell me what happened Taylor." Summer asked softly.

* * *

_Taylor paced outside her car. "Okay I could just go in, knock on his door, and say, hey Ryan. What's up? No! That's stupid." She added but she was walking in the bar anyway._

"_Is he…?" Taylor asked the bartender pointing to the room she remembered Ryan entering when she left him two weeks ago. The bartender nodded and Taylor proceeded forward. _Don't say what's up?_ She thought to herself. _Don't say what's up, and you're fine._ She took a deep breath and knocked._

"_Go away Seth." She heard him yell back._

"_Uh it's not Seth." She yelled, "It's Taylor…. What's up?" Taylor closed her eyes and cursed herself._

"_Taylor?" he questioned opening the door. She gave him a small wave._

"_Hi Ryan."_

"_What are you doing here?" he asked, and when she broke out her _please don't be mad at me_ grin, he looked down at her feet where two suitcases were resting._

"_Okay I know what you're thinking and you're right. This girls crazy. Why is she showing up at my door with her luggage and personal items? What's wrong with her?" _

"_Actually," Ryan stepped in before she could add anything else, "I wasn't thinking any of those things."_

"_Really?" she asked scrunching her face up in confusion._

"_Well not until you started saying them." He shrugged. She glared at him but he reached down and picked up her suitcases opening his door so she could come in._

"_What are you doing?" she asked._

"_I assumed the reason you were at my door with your bags is cause you need a place to crash…" he asked quirking an eyebrow up._

"_You're not going to ask why?"_

"_No, I am." He nodded, "But right now I'm going back to sleep, cause I work nights."_

"_Oh…" she trailed off, "Sorry." She added when he climbed under the covers._

_"Top bunks yours." He said before falling into a deep sleep._

* * *

"Wait!" Summer interrupted, "You just showed up at his door and _Ryan Atwood_ told you to drop your things, your welcome here anytime?" she couldn't keep the skepticism from her voice.

"I know." Taylor nodded, "I thought it was weird too… but Summer? The stories not over yet."

* * *

_Taylor sat on the chair across from the beds and stared at Ryan as he slept._Okay, Townsend, step one is over. He's letting you stay, for whatever reason. You are still going to have to tell him._ She thought to herself. _

Tell him what?_ She argued back, _That your mom is so horrible to you that you couldn't stand the thought of one more night under her roof? That you couldn't last two more months with Veronica Townsend? Bet he'll be impressed by that.

_Sometimes her thoughts sounded like her mother's voice instead of her own._

_"This is so stupid." She said allowed grabbing her suitcases._

"_Put that down." Ryan said sitting up._

"_No, this is stupid and I'm sorry, so I'm just gonna leave." She said not even pausing to look back at him._

_This was the most embarrassed she'd ever been, and if she turned to face him it would only add to it. Maybe if she got out of the room before he fully woke up she could convince him it had all been a dream the next time they saw each other. Assuming they'd ever seen each other again. She'd be in France in two months… she let out a sigh as she remembered the future that was waiting for her._

"_Taylor," he sighed and she peeked back over her shoulder, against her better judgement, "just tell me what the deal is okay? You wouldn't be here if you had no where else to go."_

"_That's probably the most I've ever heard you say." She admitted putting her suitcases down and turning to face him fully._

"_Well you talk so much I had to add some words to my vocabulary just to keep up." He said giving her a small smile._

"_So it was Newport that was smothering your sense of humor?" she quipped back as she sat down next to him, on the bed._

_He rolled his eyes and nodded at her, "Well?"_

"_I'm going to France in two months. I told my mom I was leaving early so I didn't have to put up with all her criticisms. I mean I know it's only one more month, but Ryan, you never met my mother. She's horrible, and I was laying in bed yesterday trying to figure out what I could do to keep her off my back for the next two months and…" she trailed off and looked down at her feet, "And for some reason I thought of you and how you left Newport… and before I knew it I was packing my bags and writing a fake email to show my mom."_

"_Fake email?" he questioned._

"_Oh," Taylor said perking up, "Well I wrote a fake email from the Sorbonne, asking me to come two months early to see my housing and meet my fellow students, before we start the vigorous learning ahead. I used my new photo shop program and everything…" Taylor's head dropped again, "She glanced at it and told me to call Karrie if there are any problems… ever." Off Ryan's questioning gaze she added, "Karrie is our housekeeper."_

"_You can stay for two months." He shrugged._

"_Why?" she demanded. The weirdness was still there in full force but she needed to know. If Ryan had been body snatched that would explain everything, or maybe he'd hit his head. Regardless of what it was, she needed to hear it._

"_Cause you said you needed a place to stay." He stated confused._

"_Just like that?" she said disbelieving, "Ryan, you don't even know me."_

"_I know."_

"_We weren't friends at Harbor."_

"_I know." He said gritting his teeth, "I thought you _wanted_ to stay here?"_

"_I do." She said slumping, "But I don't want you to let me stay cause you feel sorry for me."_

_Ryan sighed and sat back down next to her on the bed, "Taylor, the truth is, I didn't know you in high school, and I don't know you now. And it's still just as weird as it was in the diner-"_

"_Well when you put it that way." She interrupted flatly, as she stood to grab her stuff, Ryan reached for her arm and pulled her back down._

"_Let me finish." Taylor stopped and sat back down, "It's still weird, but Taylor, the only time I've felt… normal since Marissa died was when I was talking to you. I've seen Seth and Summer since, and I've spent time with them both, just like it's was and I… I just wasn't there. I can't stop thinking about you- not like that." He said when her face changed, "I just can't stop thinking of the way _I_ am, with you. It wasn't even like when I was with Marissa. It was like… it was like how I am when I'm alone, if that makes any sense."_

"_Ryan," she started slowly, "I don't think any of this makes sense." _

_Ryan half smiled, and nodded, "So do you want to stay?"_

* * *

"Oh my god." Summer said softly, "So he like _needed_you."

Taylor shrugged awkwardly, "I don't know about that. He was just _curious_ about me, at the time."

"So wait," Summer said, she disagreed with Taylor's theory of Ryan being curious but she decided to put that on the back burner, for a bit, "Why didn't you go to France two months later?"

"Oh." Taylor said nervously adjusting her hair, "Well Ryan pretty much figured that out in the first month I was there. But I didn't until the day before I left."

* * *

"_My stuff is packed," Taylor said, Ryan nodded, "I guess I can call a cab to the airport tomorrow."_

_Ryan wiped down the bar, and Taylor sat on the other side, "Yep."_

"_Ryan!" she snapped._

"_What?"_

"_Aren't you the least bit upset that I'm leaving? Or does our friendship mean more to me than it does to you?" she demanded hurt._

_Ryan sighed, "No, I just know something you don't. Now go get a good nights sleep, Taylor."_

"_What do you mean, you know something I don't?"_

"_Taylor." He deadpanned and pointed to their room. She obediently hopped off the stool and went inside._

"_Damn Ryan." She said once the door was closed. She was gonna miss him. Seth and Summer had been her first friends, but Ryan was the first_best_ friend she ever had. Even if they were an odd pair. _

_Sometimes she felt that he knew her better than she knew herself. Like he'd bring her coffee in the morning before he crashed from his night shift and it would be perfect. Not too much sugar, not to much crème, just right. It was like drinking baby bears coffee. _

_And he always knew when she wanted to be left alone to translate her French poems. Sometimes as a thank you she'd give him one or two of her favorites. _

_She looked around the small room with a heavy heart. She didn't want to leave this place. She loved everything about this bar. How the customers always referred to her as Ryan's roommate, cause Ryan was their favorite bartender, how his boss was constantly offering her a job, because he thought the place could use an attitude like hers. _

_What was she gonna do in France that was so great? Find the love of her life and get married in his family's château? _As if._ That was the stuff of fairytales and Taylor Townsend had never had time for fairytales. Well… except for the Little Mermaid._

_Who was going to take care of Ryan after he got done with those stupid cage fights? Who was gonna keep the room clean? God knows Ryan is such a slob. She picked up an empty cup he'd left on the side table._

I don't want to go to France. I just wanted away from my mother. France seemed like a good a place as any…_she thought to herself, _I was lonely when I decided to go. I just wanted to meet people who didn't know me as Taylor**Dork**send.

* * *

"And Ryan never thought of you like that." Summer finished.

Taylor nodded, "No he did not." She looked at her friend, who was still having trouble comprehending it all, "Ryan and I are just friends, Summer. I helped him out when he needed someone- someone he didn't know. And he helped me when I needed to get away from my mother."

"But why didn't you tell us? Why send us all these emails from France?"

"Because I was afraid." She said softly, "I was afraid of what you'd all think. I'm not good at failing Summer. And by choosing to hide out from my mother with Ryan Atwood of all people- well I just thought you guys would all think badly of me."

"Taylor, I love you. I could never think badly of you." Summer reached out to hug the girl.

"I'm so lucky I have a friend like you Summer." Taylor held back her tears.

"And Ryan." Summer said with a smile.

Taylor looked down at her hands, "Yeah, and Ryan. Why don't you go back in?" she added pointing to the comic book store, "I'm gonna get a cinnibun." Summer nodded, gave the girl one more hug, then went to find her boyfriend.

Taylor pulled out her cell phone and called a cab, she cast one glance over her shoulder and smiled at the sight of Ryan hugging Kirsten. _Good for him_.

* * *

_Ryan came into the room at about six in the morning. Taylor hadn't slept that night. She'd decided to stay, and now she just had to ask Ryan._

"_Hey." She said softly._

"_Sure." He shrugged laying down on his bed._

"_Sure what?" she questioned._

"_Sure you can stay, and sure I'll talk to Andy about you getting a waitressing job." _

"_Just like that?" she questioned._

_He nodded, "Just like that."_

"_Okay, then." She said climbing onto her bunk, she let her hand hang over the side, lazily, and she felt Ryan interwine their finger together._

"_I think I need you around Taylor." He said, offering the only explanation he had for his odd behavior over the past two months, "I think you keep me from loosing my mind."_

"_Oh." She said, too surprised to come up with anything else._

* * *

Taylor waved to Andy on her way to her door. She started putting Ryan's things in his bags. She knew he was going back to the Cohen's. It was where he belonged, and she wasn't going to stand in the way of that.

She even went out to the Dumpster to retrieve something she knew he'd regret getting rid of.

"Hey." He said entering the room, confused at the sight in front of him, "I looked for you. Summer said you went to get a Cinnabun. You know they don't sell those here at the bar right?"

"And they say you don't know how to joke." Taylor paused and then grinned up at him, "They're right." He nodded, "So I packed your stuff together and I got this, cause I know you're gonna want it one day."

He nodded again, "Thanks. You need help with your stuff?"

She sighed and stared down at her hands, "Ryan I'm not going anywhere."

"What?" he hadn't been prepared for this. He figured Taylor had left early to pack their things, cause that's what Taylor, did. She packed and planned and he just followed. But now she was saying she wasn't going anywhere, but he was. He was moving back to Newport. _She had to come, too._

"Where would I go? My mother thinks I'm in France." She said, "Ryan I stayed here to get away from her."

"I-I-I don't know where you could go, but- Taylor- you… I need you." He sank to his knees next to her, and she shook her head.

"No, you don't." she said softly, "You're going to be fine, Ryan. You have Mr. And Mrs. Cohen, and Seth, and you know I'll still be here for you Ryan."

He angrily stood back up and grabbed his bags. How could she be acting like this was nothing? For the past five months he'd only just barely survived because of her. And now he was supposed to just let her go? And she expected him to be _fine_?

"Fine." He said opening the door, "I guess I'll see you around."

* * *

It had been one day. He was happy to be home with the Cohen's where he belonged, but a part of him missed being with Taylor. It was like he belonged here with Kirsten, Sandy, and Seth, but he also belonged in the bar with Taylor. Maybe not even in the bar, but just with her.

He wasn't lying when he told her he needed her. One night without her hand to hold and he had insomnia. He wondered what she was doing as he made his bed. It was purely a formality. He knew he was just going to lie there for a few hours like he had the night before.

Maybe tonight he'd look in that folder Julie gave him. It was something to do.

He glanced at the clock. It was nearly one in the morning, and he heard the doorknob to the pool house turn.

"Oh thank god." He sighed as it opened.

"Couldn't sleep." Taylor shrugged sheepishly.

"Me neither." He nodded, and made some room for Taylor on the bed. She arched her eyebrow at him as she started to crawl up the bed, "We'll go shopping for bunk beds in the morning."

Taylor nodded and threaded her fingers through his.

* * *

Okay so that was chapter two. I hope you guys liked it. Next chapter Ryan's going to Mexico, and Taylor's going to Brown. Taylor and Ryan haven't really addressed their weird relationship yet, but their friends are going to.

Please review, it makes me happy.

-Em


	4. Chapter 3

Before I start I just want to say that this chapter is as promised dedicated completely to ObsessedRomantic for starting the second installment of Townwood Hills. For those of you reading this that haven't checked out her RT fics- well what the hell is wrong with you all?! Go read them right now. AU season four Ryan and Taylor can wait for a bit.

* * *

"Okay Ryan, man I gave you your space yesterday, as it was your first official day back into the Cohen household, and cause you were kind of brooding but-"Seth stopped dead. He had been doing his usual thing to introduce Seth/Ryan time. He entered the pool house already talking so Ryan had no choice but to listen. He was opening the blinds when he hazard a glance over his shoulder to see Ryan staring at him sleepy and confused, which wasn't the unusual part about the morning.

Taylor Townsend was in the bed next to him… and they were holding hands… their fingers were laced together not cupped, so it must be serious. He remembered listening to the debate Summer and Marissa had over it in fifth grade and Summer's opinion was laced fingers meant they had to be together. Which was why at every available moment from the day Summer decided to give him the time of day, whenever they'd hold hands he'd be sure to thread their fingers together.

Seth shook his head realizing how off topic he'd gotten, "Okay I think it is way too early for me to be seeing this."

"Well you were the one who walked into the house without knocking." Ryan pointed out, finally removing his hand from Taylor's to rub his eyes.

"Good morning Seth." Taylor said brightly, before stretching, and Seth couldn't understand how she was acting so normal. As if this sort of thing happened everyday.

"Taylor," he nodded still confused, "I thought you left yesterday when Summer did. Won't they mind you missing classes this close to vacation? Thanksgiving is only a few weeks ago."

"Summer left yesterday? And you have no idea why I'm here with Ryan?" Seth shook his head no to both questions, "She didn't talk to you about Ryan and me… what is going on with her?"

"I wish I knew." Seth sighed sitting down on a chair, finally.

"Seth _nothing_ is going on between me and Ryan." Taylor said, moving to the end of the bed to where her sneakers were. Seth let out a skeptical like squeak, and Ryan, as if he hadn't heard Seth added, "Well not_nothing_."

"Nothing romantic." Taylor dismissed searching for a comb or brush to run through her hair. She'd left the bar in such a rush that she didn't even think of packing her things. She'd have to do that. At least she told Andy she quit before she left.

Ryan stood finally and walked over to the bathroom where he grabbed a comb and handed it to her, before walking back over to Seth and taking the coffee the taller boy had offered.

"You're going to tell me what this is about later, right?" Seth asked quietly, "I mean it's one thing to give Taylor Townsend a place to stay, its another thing when you guys wake up with your fingers _laced_ Ryan. And then you say there's nothing romantic going on."

Ryan shrugged and glanced over his shoulder to see Taylor pacing in the kitchen. She looked deep in thought so he wasn't going to interrupt her, "Okay!" she said finally, "I have to go." Ryan stood to protest, but she walked over and pushed him back down on the bed, "I'll be back, but I have to go get my stuff from the bar and then I think I need to pay somebody a visit. I'll be gone a day," she continued and Seth felt a little uncomfortable at the way they were talking as if he wasn't even in the room. Like they were in their own little world and he made a mental note to add TAYLOR in big capital letters to the list of things they had to talk about in Seth/Ryan time, "We'll go bunk bed shopping when I get back?"

Ryan nodded and Seth added a bullet under Taylor's name with _bunk bed_ written underneath, "Let's not tell Kirsten and Sandy about Taylor staying here until she gets back then."

There was a long silent pause when Seth realized they were addressing him, "Oh! Right, yeah. No mentioning the female companion to The Kirsten or Sandy."

Taylor smiled at him in an amused way, while Ryan kept his gaze focused on her, like he was afraid she was going to walk out the door and never come back. Seth added a _(Urgent!!!) _next to Taylor's name.

"I'll be back," she smiled once more to Seth then stopped at the door, she spun around with her finger already pointed at Ryan, "Don't do anything stupid."

For the first time all morning, Seth noticed, Ryan avoided Taylor's gaze. Taylor glared at him some more before turning to Seth. She mouthed, '_Don't let him leave the house without you.'_ Seth nodded, still confused and Taylor said goodbye once more.

* * *

Seth walked into the pool house for the second time that day, hoping to get Ryan interested in doing something, that would lead to Seth-Ryan time where he could ask the boy about a certain auburn haired girl, and her hold on his brother.

"Yeah, yeah." Ryan said into the phone with his back turned from Seth, "I'm heading out there in a bit. I just have to put some gas in my car and then I'm going."

Seth remembered Taylor's words, 'Don't let him leave the house without you,' and slipped back out of the pool house to go pack. He had no idea where he was going, but he knew Taylor was right and that Ryan shouldn't be left alone.

* * *

Taylor stepped onto campus and sighed taking in the college life around her. _This was supposed to be me and Ryan._ She thought to herself. _We were supposed to have the college experience, and instead we've spent the last three and a half months, that we should have been in school, working at some dirty bar._

She headed for the direction she knew Summer's room to be in. Of course it was still early afternoon, so Taylor didn't expect the girl to be in her room. The door was wide open, but when Taylor peered in no one was to be found.

Shrugging the girl sat on Summer's bed and sighed. The past twenty-four hours had been probably the hardest she'd had in a while, and now instead of relaxing and trying to figure where she was going from here, she'd hopped the first plane to Rhode Island and was currently waiting to fix Summer.

_Fix Summer._ She thought sadly to herself, cause it was true. There was something wrong with her friend. She didn't have too much experienced with friends, seeing as Summer, Seth, and Ryan were her very first ones,_ But if your friends are in trouble you do whatever it takes to help them._ At least that's what she and Ryan had been doing for each other.

Taylor laid back on the bed, she'd only slept about eight hours the night before. And the night before that she hadn't gotten any sleep cause she was crying too much. But she preferred not to think about that. _It's kinda cold in here._ She pulled Summer's blanket up and let her eyes drift…

* * *

Ryan shoved some of his stuff in his duffle bag, left a note on the dresser in case Taylor came back before he did, and left the pool house. He quickly shoved the bag in the back of his jeep and jumped in without a glance back. He had just made it down the driveway when he slammed on the brakes.

"Ow." Seth exclaimed as his side hit the seat, he lifted his head from his hiding spot in the back seat, "Oh hey Ryan."

"What are you doing, Seth?"

"Taylor told me not to leave you alone." He said ratting her out automatically. Ryan almost grinned at Seth's utter lack of courage, but he was angry at the both of them, "I'm not getting out of the car cause I'm pretty sure Taylor can kick my ass if I don't do what she says."

Ryan chuckled and nodded, while Seth climbed into the front seat, "So tell me where are we going?" Ryan shook his head indicating that he wasn't going to tell Seth, "Okay…" Seth trailed off then grinned and turned back to face Ryan, "How long have you and Taylor been "Not Romantically" hanging out?" Ryan groaned as he put the car in drive.

* * *

Summer walked into her room, dropping her books by the door. She had a few minutes to herself before Che started the 24 hour tree sit, and she was gonna call Seth to see how Ryan was adjusting. Her hand paused about a foot from the phone, and she sighed.

"I can't do this."

"Do what?" A sleepy voice mumbled from her bed. Summer gasped and ripped back the blanket, "Hey." Taylor said.

"Taylor?" Summer asked surprised, " What are you doing in my bed?"

"Taking a nap, living with Ryan has completely messed up my sleep cycle." Taylor noted the bags under the other girl's eyes, and smiled, "Oh do you wanna get in? We can snuggle."

"No," Summer said, "What are you doing here instead of in Newport or that STD filled bar that you work in?"

"Oh, I don't work there anymore." Taylor said shaking her head, "I moved in with Ryan last night. We're supposed to go shopping for bunk beds sometime this week."

"You moved in with Ryan?" Summer could not handle all of this information right now, "Right, what exactly are you doing in Providence, in my bed?"

"Why did you leave and not tell Seth?"

"I left cause I have school, and I told Seth, I left him a message on his answering machine." Summer said weakly.

"I didn't mean why didn't you tell Seth you were leaving- Summer! You didn't even tell him you were leaving?" This was worse than Taylor thought, "Why didn't you tell Seth about me and Ryan."

"It didn't come up."

"Yeah, it didn't come up cause you're avoiding talking to him." Taylor shot back, "Summer what is going on with you?" She pushed Summer onto the bed and knelt down in front of her, "Is this about- oh my god!" Taylor broke off, "When was the last time you shaved your legs?" Her eyes went lower and she added, "And what happened to your toes?"

"Yeah, I don't do that stuff anymore." Summer deadpanned, obviously unwilling to talk about it.

"Yeah, no kidding." Taylor said still staring at her friend's toes, "You have hobbit feet."

"Summer!" Che burst into the room, "Leonard just spotted the chainsaws, this thing is going down now."

Summer moved to get up but Taylor grabbed her hand, "Summer."

"Taylor, I gotta go, look my diner card is on the desk. Go get something to eat, we'll talk later." Summer rushed out of the room without a glance back and Taylor's worry meter skyrocketed.

* * *

Ryan threw Seth's phone on the ground, "I can't keep watching you to make sure you're not calling your dad."

"Gonna be kinda hard to now." Seth pointed out, with a shrug. But when Ryan's phone rang Seth felt a surge of hopefulness, "You're allowed a phone." He added, damn his sarcastic nature.

"It's not Sandy." Ryan said with a half smile, and Seth's hope flopped _hopelessly_ on the ground, like a fish out of water, "It's Taylor." His hope lost the gills and grew some wings, "Hey. Where are you?" He threw a sideways glance at Seth, "Oh yeah? Seth and I just took a trip- what? No I'm not! It's not stupid- look you don't- no I'm not going back until I see this through. I'll see you when I get back, goodbye." Ryan closed his cell phone with a mixture of anger and desperation painted all over his face.

"She not happy?" Seth asked softly.

"No." was all Ryan said as they walked back to the car, and the rest of the ride was silent.

* * *

Taylor looked down at her cell phone. She was pissed. Pissed that he'd gone when she told him not to do anything stupid. Pissed that he'd dragged Seth along on this suicide mission of his. But mostly she was pissed that she was stuck trying to help Summer out of this _go green_ phase, that was clearly just a way of dealing with Marissa's death, instead of making sure Ryan didn't get himself killed.

_One step at a time._She told herself and zeroed in on Summer on the grass, with that raggedy guy from earlier, and Summer had dissed_Ray_? Of course Taylor knew she wasn't cheating on Seth with this guy, but still if what Amber said was true, she was spending a lot of time with this _Che_ person, _Dinner first._ She added to herself, if the signs were any indication, Summer wasn't go anywhere until the tree was 'safe' or whatever, and she needed some time to come up with a plan.

* * *

Ryan knew he'd get in trouble for this later. With Sandy, Kirsten, Seth, Summer would probably be mad that he dragged her boyfriend out to Mexico and then ditched him to go find the guy that killed his ex-girlfriend, and then of course Taylor would be furious if she wasn't already.

But he had to do this and he just hoped they'd all understand.

As he left the 'hotel' he contemplated calling her, and telling her just exactly what he was doing. He didn't know if it was because he wanted her to tell him it was okay, or maybe for her to talk him out of it. Cause he knew while Seth failed, Taylor would be able to do it with a few simple words. He didn't know what those words were, cause if he did he wouldn't be headed to Volchok's place of work, but he knew Taylor'd be able to find them in a matter of seconds.

Which is why he turned his cell phone off and walked into the bar.

* * *

Taylor watched as Summer fluffed Che's pillow, in disgust. Who was this girl and what had she done with Summer? The Summer she knew wouldn't just abandon Seth at the time he needs her most. The Summer she knew would hear a story as juicy as her's and Ryan's and would tell the whole Cohen and Robert's clan in a heart beat, and so far the only people who knew she was sleeping in Ryan's room and had been for the past five months, were Summer, Ryan, Seth, and herself.

"Move it Hippies." Taylor said moving her way through the crowd to Summer.

"Taylor, hey." Summer said, noticing the other girl, "Listen you can have my bed tonight cause I'm gonna be out here."

"Uh-huh," Taylor said with a big fake smile as she reached out to grab Summer's wrist, "I need to talk to you."

"Whoa, Taylor! Wait what?" Summer asked when Taylor had dragged her a few feet away from Che. To be honest Summer didn't appear to be putting up to much struggle to get away from the guy, so Taylor loosened her grip, but she needed to ask anyway.

"What is going on between you and that Che character?" Taylor asked glancing over Summer's shoulder to see him watching them.

"That Che character?" Summer repeated, "What are you talking about?"

"I am talking about you leaving Newport and your _boyfriend_ after what an hour of time together?" she said, grabbing her friend's shoulder and looking her in the eye, "Summer he needs you, and I'm not saying you should be sacrificing your school work or classes or anything but if you have time to save a -what?- _300 year old_ tree, then you should have time to get on the phone and talk to Seth."

"Seth is a big boy, and he can take care of himself." Summer said snapped, right as Taylor was about to respond her cell phone rang.

"Hello?" she snapped not letting go of Summer's right arm.

"Taylor?" Seth asked.

"Seth?" She panicked letting go of Summer's arm, but the girl was going no where now that she knew who was on the phone, "What's wrong? What happened?"

"What happened?" Summer repeated in a shaky voice, "What's going on?"

"Ryan, he's disappeared. I had to use a phone in this bar, just t call you cause he smashed my phone- but I don't car about the stupid phone- Taylor I'm not sure what I should do right now. He's going after Volchuk and I have no idea where to find either one of them."

"Damn it!" she swore angrily, "Why is he being such a- Damn it!" she cried again.

"Is it Seth? Is everything okay?" Summer asked shaking Taylor's arm.

Taylor nodded, "Seth is fine. It's Ryan that we're worr-" Taylor broke off as Summer turned her back and headed for her spot by the tree, "Summer!"

"I have to save the tree." Was all she said.

"Summer's with you?" Seth asked confused, "Where are you? Can I talk to her?"

"I'll explain later Seth." Taylor said trying to come up with a plan.

"Okay, look I have an idea, but I'm gonna have to call you back okay?"

"What? No, Seth-" Taylor was met with a dial tone, "Damn it." She added softly, and did the only thing she could do, head back to Summer's room to lie awake and worry.

* * *

Summer walked in the room at about eight o'clock the next morning. She was surprised to see Taylor already awake and packed.

"You're leaving?" Taylor nodded, "Oh… I kinda liked having you here."

"All I did was nag you." Taylor pointed out with a small smile.

"It was just like old times." Summer grinned.

"I have to get back, you know Ryan and Seth stuff from last night." Summer nodded and looked away guiltily, "Listen Summer, I know this is your way of coping, but you can't shut the rest of us out okay? Seth cares about you, you have to let him in sometime. Okay you are using this Che guy, and all of this save the earth stuff to hide from him."

"I'm not hiding from Seth, and I do let you guys in." Summer tried to defend herself.

"Summer you came back to Newport to fix the whole Ryan situation, so Seth would stop calling you. Not completely, but so he'd stop calling everyday to remind you of what you left behind, and yes maybe you fixed something even bigger in exchange, but the facts still remain. Summer how often do you call him? Once a week? A month?" Summer looked down at her feet, "Summer just talk to me- or better yet talk to Seth- write him a letter anything. Just…just tell him what you're going through, and he'll help you, if you let him."

"I think you spent a little too much time in that bar playing make believe with Ryan- you know, that you and he were happy and making a well adjusted life for yourselves- cause here in the real world we hide our feelings." Taylor rolled her eyes, "And since when did saving the earth become a bad thing?"

"I didn't say it was." Taylor was quick to defend herself, "And yeah me and Ryan were playing make believe but we snapped out of it!"

"Only because I kicked you out of it!" Summer said standing, "You came here after months of living a lie and all you've done is tell me what's wrong with my life! When you are the one who still hasn't told her mother- and I'm betting Mr. And Mrs. Cohen- how you've been living with Ryan since the beginning of the summer, so you're the one avoiding things, Avoider!"

"Fine," Taylor said, "Be that way. But you're gonna lose Seth and then you'll wish you listened to me." Taylor grabbed her bag and turned to storm out but something stopped her so she turned back and added, "Don't worry, I'll take care of whatever mess the boys got themselves into last night." She sent the girl a small girl, which was returned and left.

* * *

Taylor was gonna kill him. Sure he hadn't actually said the words but the threat had been implied. He had actually threatened Seth so he would tell him where Volchuk was. She was going to kill him, he thought to himself once more as he gripped the pipe hidden in his jacket sleeve. He could see the door. He was so close. Soon Volchuk would be dead, just like…

He knocked on the door. No answer. He knocked again. No answer. Time to do this the Chino way. He broke open the door and came face to face with four empty walls and no Volchuk.

"Damn it!" he swore slamming the pipe against the wall, now Taylor really was going to kill him, cause _he_ really was going to kill Seth.

He walked back down the hallway and towards the exit, only to stop dead when he realized he needed a worse way to kill Seth, because Kirsten and Sandy were there waiting.

* * *

Taylor stepped out of the cab in front of the Cohen's. She was going to have to make her way around the house and to the pool house without Mr. and Mrs. Cohen seeing her. Which was proving to be very easy but she stopped short when she saw Seth heading to the pool house, and Ryan adjusting the blinds.

_At least the boys are safe._ She shrugged to herself, _Well for now. I am gonna kill Ryan afterall._

But she watched as Ryan closed the blinds effectively shutting Seth out, "Damn it." She sighed, and walked over to Seth, putting her arm around his shoulder, "I'll go deal with it." He nodded, "Summer's gonna be okay, by the way. She just needs some time, and to know that we aren't going anywhere."

"I don't know how you know this, or why but thank you." He said, and turned to go inside the house.

"But don't call her." Taylor said quickly, "Wait for her to call you." He nodded and she walked up to the pool house door, she tried the handle but found it locked, so she knocked on the door.

"Go away Seth." Ryan barked.

"It's not Seth." She said softly, but he heard her and unlocked the door.

"Look it's been a long day." He said closing and locking the door once she was inside.

"Let's just go to sleep." She nodded and moved toward the bed, "We'll deal with it in the morning."

* * *

Well okay, there you go guys, chapter three- or four depending on how you look at it.

Please review and tell me if you loved it or hated it. Or maybe a little of both, whatever, just tell me.

-Em


	5. Chapter 4

"You do realize that you can't go on like this, right?" Taylor asked, folding her jeans and putting them into a drawer that Ryan had cleaned out for her. "First of all it's been over a week, and you haven't left the pool house, or unlocked the door. You need to tell Kirsten and Sandy about me staying here, you need to go make up with Seth because he did the right thing, and we need to go shopping for bunk beds."

Ryan held up three fingers and counted down as he answered each of her points, "Seth probably already told Kirsten and Sandy that you're here, I don't need to make up with him, because first of all we're guys, and guys don't _make up_, and second because he was not right. And this bed is big enough for now."

Taylor threw a rolled up sock at him, "Get up!" He threw the sock back and rolled over on the bed to face her, "You're gonna get bed sores, and you know what? It's Thanksgiving, so go into the kitchen and find out what the deal is for dinner and get me some breakfast because we have no food in here."

He sighed and pushed himself off the bed, "Bagels? Coffee? Cereal?"

"Sure." She said absentmindedly.

Ryan huffed into the kitchen not too happy about the mission for food Taylor was sending him on. He'd rather they just went to the grocery store instead of walking the twenty feet to the house.

As he opened the fridge to grab the milk he could hear Seth in the other room leaving Summer a message. Taylor had told him about the girl she found at Brown, who was so different from the girl he'd been friends with, and he felt a little bad for shutting Seth out in his moment of need. But then he remembered what Seth did and he had no problem giving the boy the silent treatment.

"Ryan." Kirsten said surprised to see him in the house, he muttered a _hey_ and went back to pouring cereal in the bowl. Seth hung up his cell phone and Sandy walked into the kitchen, all aware of how awkward this was, "Coffee?"

"Sure." Ryan responded, and all four of them turned to watch the coffee filtering through the coffee maker, when Sandy's cell phone rang interrupting the silence.

" 'scuse me." He said going to the other room, "Uh huh, where are you?"

"OK, enough of this! No more tip-toeing, no more silences, it is Thanksgiving and this family is gonna get over what happened and move on with their lives." Kirsten said annoyed.

"I don't know if it'll be that easy." Seth said sparing an uneasy glance at Ryan who looked like he was ready to run for the door.

"No one said it was gonna be easy, but this family is gonna work together and make Thanksgiving dinner. You two, grocery store, together."

"I have to pick up Summer." Seth said.

"Yeah, and I have stuff-" Ryan started pointing back to the pool house.

Kirsten narrowed her eyes and folded her arms, watching the two of them, "Or we could go now." Seth said grabbing Ryan's arm and dragging him towards the door. Kirsten nodded while Ryan tried to protest more, but Seth kept dragging him.

* * *

"So what's next?" Seth asked, as he pushed the cart through the aisles.

"Parsley." Ryan sighed glancing at the list, "You don't think your mom will go into the pool house do you?"

"So what if she does?" Seth asked, "She'll find out you and Taylor have been playing house without the sex part. Is that really such a bad thing?" Ryan didn't respond and Seth was reminded yet again that they weren't on normal speaking terms. "Wow, this trip to the grocery store has been a real success."

"Well what do you expect? You think we can get over everything just because we're buying parsley?" Ryan asked rhetorically, though truth be told, he knew no question you direct at Seth can be considered rhetorical.

"It's more than a garnish Ryan. It's a good omen." Ryan closed his eyes and muttered, "Yeah." Seth pushed the cart further and Ryan heard him mutter under his breath, "Speaking of omens." He glanced up and saw Julie standing there.

"Julie." Ryan nodded.

"Ryan." She said in the same tone.

"Hello Julie. I wanted to thank you for that travel tip. Ensenada turned out to be the perfect vacation spot for the Cohen's. We may get a timeshare." Seth put in sarcastically, which led to Julie telling him to save it, Sandy had already given her the lecture, Ryan wished he'd sprung Taylor for this trip to the store. He'd have an easier time dealing with this if she was here. When Julie asked him to join her in the samples, he said yes and Seth went to get the sweet potatoes.

Damn it, where was Taylor, when he needed her.

* * *

Kirsten was leaving Sandy yet another message, when she spotted Taylor in her kitchen, "Oh my God. Taylor, I thought you were in France."

Taylor froze, the spoon about a foot from the pot, _Ryan's gonna kill me, Ryan's gonna kill me!_ She didn't even lift her gaze to meet Kirsten's as she stuttered out, "I am... uh, I was. In fact what am I doing here where gay Paris beckons. Au revoir." She turned to rush back out of the kitchen towards the pool house but Kirsten's demanding voice stopped her.

"Hold it. When a kid is stealing stuffing in my kitchen, that's usually a sign that something's wrong." Kirsten said, when Taylor finally turned to face her.

"I would tell you Mrs. Cohen, but it's kind of… a long story, and…" Taylor bit her lip uncomfortably.

"I'm back." Ryan called entering the house, with all the grocery's, "Seth left to pick up Summer, and I'm just gonna bring some food into the pool house, cause the fridge out there is empty, and then I'm gonna go find Sandy. I-" Ryan stopped dead when he saw Taylor standing in the kitchen, only five feet away, "Oh."

"You knew she was here?" Kirsten asked, raising her eyebrow at him.

"You couldn't have stayed in the pool house?" he sighed at Taylor.

"_You_ couldn't have brought me the food that I asked for?" she countered, folding her arms, and glaring at him.

"What is going on here?" Kirsten demanded.

Ryan placed the grocery's on the island in the middle of the kitchen, "She can tell you." He pointed to Taylor, "I have to go see Sandy."

"No you do not." Taylor said quickly. Whatever Ryan was in a hurry to do, it wasn't good. She could tell by his posture, and the edge in his voice, "Sit down."

"Taylor, I gotta-" She glared at him, and he sighed falling into the kitchen chair.

"I already explained the whole thing to Summer by myself. It's _your_ turn." She turned to smile brightly at Kirsten, "You two talk. I'll start the turkey."

"Wait, I-" Kirsten started to interrupt.

"Oh, don't worry Kiki, I'm a wiz at cooking."

Kirsten turned back to Ryan, "Well?"

"Yeah, she's a good cook." Ryan nodded, and Kirsten adjusted her gaze letting him know that she wasn't asking about Taylor's cooking skills, "Oh right… well Taylor and I have been living together for the past five months."

When Ryan said nothing more Taylor groaned from the kitchen, "Seriously? That's all your gonna say?"

"What more is there?" he asked, and Kirsten grinned at their banter, as Taylor sat down next to Ryan and started telling her the reason she was now living in the pool house with Ryan.

* * *

After an hour of conversation with Kirsten and Taylor, Ryan was finally free to go find Sandy and pretend to apologize and be over the Volchuk thing. Well free if you didn't count the fact that Taylor had jumped into his car, to avoid having Kirsten take her to see her mother.

Of course Taylor knew he was up to no good. She definitely wouldn't believe him, if she heard what he'd been rehearsing in his head to say to Sandy.

"Why are you so quiet?" she asked after fiddling with the radio for a few minutes.

"I don't talk so much, that's you." He shrugged.

Taylor half grinned as they pulled up to Sandy's work, "Are we gonna relate the whole story to Sandy too? Because I'm pretty sure Kirsten will do it later."

"No, I need to talk to him." Ryan said getting out of the car, she followed suspiciously.

"Why?"

"Do I need a reason to talk to Sandy?" he asked, as she linking her arm through his.

"I thought you don't talk so much?" she countered, and looked around, "Besides, it looks like he's leaving anyway." She pointed to Sandy's car leaving the lot, and then gasped reaching to cover Ryan's eyes, but he had already seen.

"What is-?" His fists clenched together as he watched Sandy drive off with Volchuk in the passenger seat of his car.

"Ryan, don't-"

"Don't what?" he snapped, "Don't get angry? Don't react? I have to go." He shrugged out of her hold and started for the car.

"Ryan!" she yelled, "Don't do this, don't be an idiot."

"Taylor go home."

"I don't have a home Ryan." She said softly, "Please, don't do this."

"I'll send Seth and Summer to get you." He said opening his door, he pulled a twenty out of his pocket and handed it to her, "Just go get something to eat at the diner."

"Ryan." She tried again.

"I'm sorry." Was all he said, as he pulled away.

* * *

Taylor sipped her coffee idly. She just needed to come up with a new plan to kill Ryan. Something very painful. But then she realized she couldn't kill him. It was too cold in the damn pool house at night, and he was all warm and snuggly- in a totally platonic way, of course.

Maybe she'd just do something to make him suffer. Like cut up all his wife beaters and force him to wear turtleneck shirts, that in no way showed off his impressive chest.

She grinned at the sight of him weeping over his ripped up shirts, then shook her head knowing Ryan wouldn't cry over shirts.

It wasn't that she didn't get it, cause she did. He was mad at Volchuk, and who wouldn't be? But that was no reason to kill him. Send him to jail? Yes. Kill him? No.

"Taylor?" Seth's voice cut through her thoughts.

"Seth, hey. Thanks for coming to get me. Where's Summer?" she asked looking around.

"Waiting in the car." He said like it was no big deal, but they both knew it was. Summer hadn't been in the diner since Marissa died. "Why didn't Ryan just give you a ride back to the house instead of calling us to do it?"

"Cause Ryan's dealing." She said softly putting the money on the table and getting up, "Differently from the way Summer's dealing. But in no way healthier."

"What are we supposed to do?" Seth asked confused and hurt.

"I don't know." She answered truthfully, "But Ryan left me here so I wouldn't try to stop him, I have to respect that. I don't agree with it, but I do respect him."

"Summer wants to go volunteer at the soup kitchen." Seth said, as they started for the car, "I don't agree with that- not that I don't agree with helping the poor, I just-"

Taylor shook her head, "You don't agree with her way of coping, but you're gonna respect it and help her." He nodded, "Let's go. We'll deal with Ryan, when we get back to the house."

* * *

Ryan heard the door open and knew Seth and Summer were back with Taylor, but he didn't care he was mad. How could Sandy keep this from him? "Alright look you stopped me from going after him, that I get. But to defend him..."

"We're home and we brought some friends." Seth said shuffling into the kitchen with about ten strange, scruffy looking men, and the girls.

"Seth…?" Kirsten trailed of confused.

"I'm not defending him Ryan. I'm negotiating the terms of his surrender. And he's gonna get every bit of what he deserves." Sandy went on ignoring Seth and his new 'friends' that Summer was directing into the living room.

"Ryan, Sandy and I would only do what's best for you." Kirsten added, reaching for him, but he stepped back and walked into Taylor.

He expected her to be mad at him for leaving her in the middle of town, and she was he was sure of that. But it didn't show on her face. All that showed was concern, for him, "You wanna do what's in my best interest?"

"Always." Sandy answered.

"Just leave me alone." He said grabbing Taylor's hand and dragging her out of the room.

"Ryan… wait." Sandy started but Kirsten shook her head.

"Let them go, Sandy." Was all Taylor heard as Ryan dragged her to the pool house.

"Well?" he demanded, once he shut the door behind them.

"Well what?" she asked sitting down on the bed.

"You said that we'd talk about it in the morning." He started off softly, "It's been over a week and- and…Well get mad, throw something at me! I didn't listen to you! I went to Mexico even though you told me not to, I left you in the _middle of town_ and told you I'd _send Seth_. **Be mad at me**!"

"Ryan, you're grieving. I am mad at you but I'm not going to yell." She said. Sure she'd been envisioning different ways she could hurt him in retaliation, but when it came down to it, she couldn't. Not when he was already hurting enough.

"Why not?" he yelled, "You're pissed, you yell! Or at least you _used to_, what the hell happened?"

"_What happened_?" she laughed bitterly, "What happened is for the past few weeks you've been obsessed with killing the man who accidentally killed your high school girlfriend. So instead of yelling at you like I used to I stopped to not push you over the edge."

"_Accidentally_?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes, Ryan accidentally!" She was angry now, she picked up the remote that was on his bedside table and hurled it in his direction, "Because as much as you hate to admit it, Volchuk didn't try to kill Marissa. Yes it was his fault she died," Taylor picked up a hairbrush and threw it at him, "But he didn't do it on purpose!"

"I can't believe you!" he said, as he ducked to avoid getting hit by his alarm clock, "I'm going."

"Good!" she screamed to the slamming door. After five minutes Taylor calmed down, and regretted throwing things, but she didn't regret telling him Volchuk hadn't intentionally killed Marissa. He knew it, he just didn't want to admit it to himself. She grabbed her purse off the dresser and headed back into the Cohen kitchen.

"Taylor? Where's Ryan?" Kirsten asked craning her neck to see past Taylor.

"He's looking for Volchuk." She said matter-of-factly, "And I have to go after him."

No one said anything for a long while, until Sandy broke the silence, "Come on, I'll drive."

* * *

"Come on Ryan, really? You think I'd put him up in the Mermaid Inn?" Sandy asked as Ryan rushed out of the office, to find Sandy standing near his car and Taylor sitting on the hood.

"Had to check, right?" Ryan shrugged, "I've got a lot of other places to go so you mind?" he directed at Taylor so she'd get off his car.

"Actually I do." She put a hand in her bag, "You know you want me to express myself like I used to back at the bar. Now I don't keep a lot of things in here, but I have no problem throwing my lipstick and tampons at you."

"Taylor." He said reaching into his car to honk the horn, "I'm serious. I have to go."

"Ryan why don't you just come with us?" Sandy asked.

"Yeah? So you can take me home and give me one of your lectures?" He asked, then added in Taylor's direction, "And then you can go back to being the mute that I've been sharing a room with for the past week?"

"Oh, we're beyond all that." Sandy said, speaking for himself. He still had less of a grasp on the Ryan and Taylor situation than Kirsten, but he was gonna go with it.

"So where are we going?" Ryan asked.

"Come find out." Taylor said and Ryan ducked the flying tampon, and offered her his hand so she could slide off the car. The three of them walked to Sandy's car.

* * *

"If this is some kind of dare, I'm gonna take it." Ryan said as the three stood in front of a motel.

"I trust you." Sandy said.

When Ryan turned to Taylor she shrugged, "Just go, so we can move on with our lives."

Ryan walked up to the door and didn't knock, as he did in Mexico, but walked right in. Volchuk was sitting on the bed almost as if he was waiting for Ryan. _He probably has been for a long time._ Taylor's voice said in his head.

He shook his head, wanting all thoughts of Taylor gone for this. If he thought about how he'd been behaving towards her lately he might stop and go back out to apologize, and he couldn't do that now. Not when he had this to take care of.

* * *

"He still in there?" One of Sandy's friends, Otis asked.

"Yeah." Sandy replied and Taylor rung her hands together nervously.

"Maybe we should go in there." Otis suggested.

"Give him a minute." Taylor said, in a small voice, "He'll be okay." She added and believed it with all her heart.

* * *

"I don't wanna hear about how bad you feel. Tell me why you did it." Ryan said and he knew his voice was on the edge of pleading. This was it. This was when he heard the answer that made everything better. Why Volchuk killed her.

"Does it matter?" Volchuk asked. He was so tired, Ryan could hear it in his voice.

"It matters to me." Ryan growled.

"I don't know, OK? I mean, I was coming after you. You got the girl, I didn't, and that was hard for me to handle. I just... I wanted you to pull over. And it all just got out of control." Volchuk scrambled for an explanation, and Ryan thought the other man might cry.

"Wait so that's it?" It couldn't be. Was it what Taylor said? Just an- "It was all an accident? A mis- a mistake?"

"I know that doesn't change anything, so if you wanna finish this... I'm not gonna fight back."

Ryan gripped the broken bottle again, but then put it back down. It was an accident. He didn't mean to kill her. Doesn't mean he has no blame in this but- Taylor was right. "I'm not doing you any favors. You have to live with what you did. It's over." He got up and walked over to the door. He looked directly into her face as he opened the door. It was clouded with fear and worry for him.

Taylor rushed forward and embraced him, "I'm so mad at you."

"I know." He said, and almost smiled.

"I'm proud of you." Sandy said, clapping him on the back when Taylor pulled away, "So you two hungry?"

"Starved." They both answered.

Ryan grabbed Taylor's hand and walked back to Sandy's car, "I'll yell at you after dinner." She said softly.

"And throw things?"

"You're gonna need a helmet." She nodded, "Uh Mr. Cohen? We need to make a stop first."

* * *

"I don't know if I support this." Sandy stated as the two got out of the car.

"Sandy, it's no different than what I just did." Ryan said shrugging, "I have to go talk to her."

Ryan and Taylor walked up the steps of the Cooper-Robert's house and found Julie and Summer in the dining room, holding hands.

"Hey." Julie said softly, brushing away her tears.

"Summer, can I talk to you?" Taylor asked tilting her head towards the other room. Summer nodded and followed Taylor out, while Ryan sat down next to Julie.

"Can you do me a favor?" Julie asked Ryan softly, he nodded, "Can you- Will you tell me about her?"

"What?"

"Anything. Just tell me about her." Julie said in tears.

"I remember the first time I saw her. She was... she was wearing this white top thing, and I think she had jeans on. She was standing at the bottom of the driveway. And I thought... well that she was really hot. Really hot. She gave me a smile." They both laughed and Julie nodded.

"It was a really beautiful smile."

* * *

"Do you need a ride to the airport?" Taylor asked Summer, after she relayed the conversation she'd had with Seth after Sandy and Taylor left.

"No, I'm gonna meet my dad there." She paused, "I'll call him."

Taylor nodded, "Okay."

"Everything he said was right, everything you said was right. I need to deal with it, but I need to do it on my own. I'm sorry I'm such a mess." Taylor shook her head.

"Summer you miss your friend." Summer nodded with some tears.

"I'm gonna go." She quickly hugged Taylor.

"Call me." Summer nodded and left.

A few minutes later Ryan and Julie came out of the dining room, "So Thanksgiving?" Ryan asked.

Taylor nodded, "Let's go."

* * *

That was a long one. And probably my favorite so far. Hope you guys liked it.

Please review.

-Em


End file.
